Straight man blues

I miss having him walk me to the car

and you know I didn't need that.

I miss knowing he'd drive to pick me up

when I was stranded, no matter when or where.

And one time I really needed him.

My straight man

knew every

gay man in the county.

He didn't invite his own brother to his own wedding,

because he said he was a homophobic son of a….

Nobody else can call me

Jew bitch

and make me laugh.

Or tell me I wasn't really gay

because I didn't know where the bars were.

And because I didn’t know where the bars were

tell me I had to get a life.

My cb radio in work clothes,

would advise me what he learned

from his school of driving, listening to audio

tapes and developing the incredible powers

of positive thinking

between service calls.

Every month he had a new program

he'd install into his life plan; then we’d meet

at Georgie’s in Asbury and he’d show me the latest notch on his belt

from the weight he lost.

I can't help it, I miss my straight man.

I know he had a wife. I know her too.

But he was my straight man and

now I have the straight man blues.

~

Some things are too beautiful to look at when they’re dying.

~

Since my sister died, I’m too aware of life and death. 

the wild blue poem series, from the first section on grief. the entire book is available through Amazon Kindle at:  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00E2UU19O